Oldbornclub
Unisex Don't Mess With Me I'm a Wooden Spoon Lead Paint No Car Seat No Bike Helmet Survivor Graphic Tee, Funny Retro Nostalgia Shirt, Casual Everyday Wear
Unisex Don't Mess With Me I'm a Wooden Spoon Lead Paint No Car Seat No Bike Helmet Survivor Graphic Tee, Funny Retro Nostalgia Shirt, Casual Everyday Wear
🆕 New customers: Use code NEW5 for 5% off your entire order!
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Your Childhood. Your Attitude. Your Story.
Create a vintage old-school tee that celebrates your unforgettable childhood memories, rebellious personality, fearless independence, and unapologetic sense of humor.
Featuring the hilarious statement:
“DON'T MESS WITH ME. I'M A WOODEN SPOON, LEAD PAINT, NO CAR SEAT, NO BIKE HELMET, PICKUP BED RIDIN', GARDEN HOSE DRINKIN' SURVIVOR.”
A bold vintage generation-inspired design combining oversized black block lettering, expressive handwritten script, classic retro typography, and a striking black-and-white color scheme — creating a hilarious blend of old-school childhood nostalgia, sarcastic humor, generational toughness, and fearless personality.
Made for those who remember growing up without smartphones, spending all day playing outside, riding bikes without helmets, drinking water straight from the garden hose, and surviving the wild adventures of an unforgettable childhood.
Because growing up old school wasn't always easy — but it sure gave us some legendary stories to tell! 😂🔥🤘
Material & Care
Material & Care
T-Shirts: 100% ring-spun cotton — soft, breathable, and built to last.
Sweatshirts: 60% cotton, 40% polyester — warm, structured, and pill-resistant.
Care instructions:
- Machine wash cold with like colors
- Tumble dry low
- Do not bleach or iron the print
- Do not dry clean
Size Guide
Size Guide
Measure around the fullest part of your chest and refer to the chart below.
S — Chest 37–40" / 94–102 cm | Waist 29–32" | Hip 35–37.5"
M — Chest 40–43" / 102–109 cm | Waist 32–35" | Hip 37.5–41"
L — Chest 43–46" / 109–117 cm | Waist 35–38" | Hip 41–44"
XL — Chest 46–49" / 117–124 cm | Waist 38–43" | Hip 44–47"
2XL — Chest 49–53" / 124–135 cm | Waist 43–47.5" | Hip 47–50.5"
3XL — Chest 53–57" / 135–145 cm | Waist 47.5–52.5" | Hip 50.5–53.5"
4XL — Chest 57–61" / 145–155 cm | Waist 52.5–57" | Hip 53.5–58.5"
Regular fit. If you are between sizes, choose the larger size for a roomier fit.
For any questions, feel free to email us at contact@oldbornclub.com — we're here to help. All our designs are original creations by our team. If you spot any copying or infringement on other platforms, please report it to us via email. Once confirmed, we'll reward you with an 8% discount coupon as a thank-you.
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